“Anonymous” Swarms D.C. To Loiter With Trendy Masks

Yesterday, November 5, as Virginians went to the voting booth to decide their next governor, their crazy neighbors on the other side of the Potomac were engaging in a “Million Mask March.”

That’s the first problem right there: protesters of all stripes putting the word “million” into the names of their “marches,” which are not marches so much as they are crowds loitering while holding signage.

“Million Muslim March,” “Million Man March,” “Million Woman March,” “Two Million Bikers to D.C.”—it’s gotten insane. Any increase in the public’s perception of the popularity of your cause is completely negated when they see that, no, there are not a million people loitering with you. Be creative; don’t adhere to the typical protest-naming parameters of specifying the number of protesters you’re expecting.

The 5th of November, otherwise known as Guy Fawkes Day, holds a special place in the bleeding hearts of the young anarcho-communists who make up the group called Anonymous, which organized the “march” of masks: it reminds them of that hip Hollywood movie they once saw with that fictional character in that neato mask.

That character went by the moniker V, and he was a Guy Fawkes fanatic, whereas today’s Fawkes-mask wearers are fanatics of the mask in the movie. They’re cultists, through and through.

Furthermore, most of them are secularists, whereas Guy Fawkes, whose face they idolize, was so Catholic that he attempted to assassinate Protestant King James, kidnap his 9-year-old daughter, raise her a Catholic, and install a Catholic monarchy. Bring a “CATHOLIC MONARCHY NOW!” sign to any protest where the Anonymous riffraff are wearing Guy Fawkes masks, and see how you’re treated.

The website for the Million Mask March states their cause: “Remember who your enemies are: billionaires who own banks and corporations who corrupt politicians who enslave the people in injustice….” Boy, they got everything in one sentence: billionaires (who provide jobs and increase quality of life for millions), banks (corrupt as some may be, they still provide millions of jobs to regular people), corporations (a.k.a. businesses, which, like billionaires, provide jobs), and politicians (by which they usually mean non-Marxist, anti-pot politicians).

Further confirmation of Anonymous’s silliness is that (1) the first rule of Anonymous is “there are no rules,” which, on their website, is followed by a list of six more rules; and (2) that their website, MillionMaskMarch.org, states that “it’s a movement, not an organization.”

The “.org” begs to differ.

The mystery is whether having a low IQ causes kids to join Anonymous, or if smart kids are drawn to Anonymous and then have their brains vacuumed out thereafter.

If I never see another Guy Fawkes mask before I die, my death will be a happy one.