When TSA Does it, it’s “Security”; When a Drunk Man Does it, it’s “Groping”

Who knows, maybe he was just trying to give the TSA a helping hand. And what did he get in return? Jail time. As they say, no good deed goes unpunished.

After making his way through security at San Francisco International Airport, a passenger stopped off at a bar and filled up on booze. Then, he proceeded to pretend as if he worked for the TSA. He didn’t even bother trying to look the part. He had on khaki pants and a blue polo shirt, and he apparently was able to swipe a pair of blue gloves from a real agent.

He ended up escorting a couple foreign women, one at a time, to the private screening room to “pat them down.” According to CBS, what exactly happened in the room is unknown, because the women evidently believed him to be a security agent. I mean, why would they question him? This is normal behavior now.

After their “private screening,” they left to catch their flights. The local CBS affiliate reported:

Real TSA agents became suspicious of the man when he was seen ushering another woman into the private screening area, because men are only allowed to screen women in the booths if a female agent is present.

The 53-year-old man was detained until police arrived. He faces a public drunkenness charge, but could face additional charges.

Hey, they should have offered the guy a job. He obviously showed initiative and a strong desire to keep America safe from terrorists. He was probably just making sure those women weren’t hiding anything.

I wonder if they’re afraid of charging him with sexual assault. I suppose they don’t really have evidence of what happened in the private screening booth – I don’t even think they have surveillance cameras in them. Obviously, nothing too terrible happened, because neither of the women reported it. But even if they had caught it on camera, can you imagine what a PR mess the TSA would have had to deal with if police charged the guy with sexual assault or something related? People would see right through that one. “Oh, you’re going to charge that guy with sexual assault, even though everything he did, he learned from the TSA?”

This also shows how terribly insecure airports are. It’s all theater; an illusion, and a bad one at that. Like the reporter said, a TSA agent would find a quarter in his pocket, but they let a drunk guy “infiltrate” them that easily? And they actually believe they’re keeping Americans safe from a large-scale terrorist attack.