Leftist: Did you hear what happened in Texas?
Rightist: No, what happened?
L: They’ve basically set up a giant concentration camp for LGBTQQIIAA+ people.
R: That’s a lot of letters.
L: Yeah, well I don’t want to discriminate against anybody.
R: So a concentration camp, eh?
L: Yeah, the tea baggers running the Texas GOP added what they call “reparative therapy” to their platform, and that’s basically a nice-sounding word for a concentration camp for gays. I mean LGBTQQIIAA+ people.
R: Hold on, hold on. What?
L: I know, right?
R: No, not right. Reparative therapy is just counseling for homosexuals who want to leave that lifestyle.
L: I…wow. Okay, one? You’re a bigot. Two, counseling implies that they need fixing, and that’s homophobic and bigoted, and you are a homophobe and a bigot.
R: Yeah, it is true that I don’t really like gay people that much, but…
L: WHAT?! OH-EM-GEE, DID YOU LITERALLY JUST SAY THAT?
R: Yes, literally, but back to the subject of reparative thera–
L: Um, no? Hello? You can’t just say you don’t like people! You can’t not like LGBTQQIIAA+ people or else you’re a homophobe! Don’t you get that?
R: Yeah, I know. I am a homophobe. I get it.
R: Stunned, I know. Reparative therapy, though, or counseling, is optional, you know, right? It’s for people who want to be changed, not who need to be changed.
L: So you’re admitting you’re a homophobe.
R: Jeez, yes, get over it, my word. Anyway, you said reparative therapy was tantamount to a concentration camp, though.
L: It is, don’t you get it?
R: Enlighten me.
L: I…because! It’s…homophobia! It’s…it’s saying that these people need to be changed!
R: And I suppose you think that’s what concentration camps were?
L: Intolerance and discrimination and all that stuff.
R: Well said. Look, all this is is that if these people want to change, they have that choice. Freedom of choice. You support that, don’t you?
L: No! Not if that choice is bad for them. Are you kidding me? I care about LGBTQQIIAA+ people, which is why I’ll only support the choices they make that are good for them. That’s what parents do, don’t you know?
R: You’re their parent now?
L: I’m saying I look out for them.
R: I’m sure they’ll appreciate you looking out for them when they’re trying to escape their fantasies of being sodomized by burly, leather-clad men, and you won’t let them.
L: That’s a stereotype and you’re a homophobe. I’m done with this conversation. You support concentration camps, so you’re a literal Nazi.