Hillary Jokes While Failing To Answer The Simplest Of Questions: If There’s Nothing To Hide, Why Hide?

The media seems to love it when Hillary jokes. What if Cheney had done it?

Every relationship between two individuals or two groups will be characterized by the ratio of secrecy that is involved in it.” – Georg Simmel

How is the relationship between the American people and presumptive Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton? Although Hillary could clear her name by providing her private email server to a third party for forensic examination, she has decided that it will “remain private.” Why? This simple question will pull upon the minds of the American people (the ones who aren’t shills or idiots anyway). If there’s nothing to hide, why hide?

In terms of public relations, I would argue that more secrecy means more rot. Given that, I’d say Hillary’s relationship with the American people is about as fresh as a corpse.

On Monday night, Hillary laughed it up with reporters (see: shills) at an event honoring journalism. You might say she gave herself a reset button:

“I am all about new beginnings—a new grandchild, another new hair style, a new email account, why not a new relationship with the press? So here goes, no more secrecy, no more zone of privacy. After all, what good did that do me?… Before I go any further, if you look under your chairs, you’ll find a simple non-disclosure agreement. My attorneys drew it up… Old habits last.”

Hillary joking about email-gate and Clintonian secrecy is like spraying air-freshener in a porta-potty; no amount of political Fabreeze is going to make Hillary smell any less rotten. But the reporters in the room sure loved it. They guffawed and cheered as if they were at a celebrity roast. I wonder if they would be laughing so hard if it were Dick Cheney cracking wise?

Let’s imagine.

Remember when it was revealed that Vice President Dick Cheney never had an official state email address? Remember when it turned out that he kept all of his work-related emails on a private server in his own home, which he decided would remain private even in the face of a Congressional investigation?

But then he made a few quips and everyone laughed. The end.

Nope. That was even hard to type.

If this were Dick Cheney—or any Republican—it would be apocalyptic. Ed Schultz’s mouth would be frothing so much, they’d have to give him a bib. It would be 24/7 coverage on all networks until Cheney released his server to a third party for forensic examination. Cheney would go down and all the so-called journalists would clink their glasses on a job well done. They slayed the beast!

But the fervor over Hillary Clinton’s emails lasted only a couple of weeks. Now the media is ready to move on. They’ve shown they can be real journalists for a hot second, but if any Republican candidate brings up the scandal in the future, so help them, they will rue the day.

So why are we allowing Hillary to get away with this obvious malfeasance? We’re not. We are not going to stop because we are the new media. We have Facebook, Twitter, blogs, and thankfully Fox, and talk radio to combat this mainstream media malaise. We will not let this go because if it quacks like a duck and walks like a duck, it’s probably a duck—or in this case, a woman who sounds like one.

We are going to continue where the mainstream stopped short. We are going to continue to ask the question until we get an answer. If there’s nothing to hide, why hide?