Democrat Senator Cory Booker Drove to Hawaii?

The guy that many people believe will be Barack Obama’s successor, Senator Cory Booker (D–New Jersey), said from the Congressional floor (during a Congressional hearing about climate change, of course) that his first and only driving trip was from New Jersey … to Hawaii.

His first vehicle was apparently the Magic School Bus, or perhaps he can actually drive on water. Or maybe Cory Booker is actually James Bond, and he had just gotten a prototype of an amphibious car from Q. I don’t know. His exact words, just in case you (like me) almost can’t believe he could have even thought this was a passable fib:

Right after I turned seventeen and got my New Jersey driver’s license, one of the earliest places I drove was a trip—the only trip I’ve ever taken—to … was to Hawaii, and I found it to be an extraordinary state, except for one…

At which point another Democrat, Martin Heinrich, saved Booker’s bacon, kind of, by stating rather baldly: “You didn’t drive to Hawaii.”

To which Booker responded: “I didn’t … ha ha ha [how hilarious!] … I did not drive to Hawaii. Thank you for that clarification, I appreciate that for the Congressional record.”

But then he doesn’t go on to explain what actually happened, because the whole driving bit was just meant to be anecdotal provenance for his one (comedic) criticism of Hawaii—that it didn’t have a Jersey-style diner. Classic. No one laughed.

His bit about driving to Hawaii is almost as good as Obama’s bit about being born there. Boom.

Conservatives regularly get painted as ignorant fools—from SNL’s regular parody of Sarah Palin donchaknow-ing to Will Ferrell’s one-man George W show. The main reason this works is that many conservatives actually are stupid—like Al Melvin during his interview with Anderson Cooper … wow. But liberals are not much better. They might be worse. It doesn’t matter. Let’s just agree that pretty much everyone in politics is stupid, fire them all, and start from scratch. It won’t hurt us to lose the few good ones as much as it will benefit us to get rid of this horde of mendacious morons.